“Would you tell me, please, which way I
ought to go from here?"
"That depends a good deal on where you want to get to."
"I don't much care where –"
"Then it doesn't matter which way you go.”
― Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland
Alice, we all love Alice, we’ve grown up wanting to be Alice.
Why? If you ask me, she could run away to wonderland. We all want to run away
to our own versions of wonderland, and that’s fine, I think the problem is, we
want to ‘run away’. I doubt Alice wanted to ‘run away’.
I, for one wanted to run away, and I had devised the perfect
plan. But most plans fail.
I think we have
started basing our futures on what the ‘big’ people say, we wait for their
approval and eventually get stuck in those same dead end jobs. I’m going to be
20 this year, for most that’s huge, but for all those ‘big’ people, I’m still
as immature as I was when I was 3.
Someone once asked me what profession I wanted to get into,
my obvious answer was writing, and that led to an hour long conversation on how
I would never succeed. That conversation got me thinking, how childish of her
to disregard my future just because she thinks I won’t make any money.
That night it hit me, for me, money was secondary to the joy
I get when I write, I don’t want money I want joy. So I took a deep look inside
and I found so much, I found that a good book and some coffee on a rainy day
makes me happy. I found so much joy in making a plate of jeera rice, typing
invoices out at work, trying my hand at gum paste, making frills, airbrushing. I
found joy in taking a long walk home, watching the sun shine on me, smiling at
a stranger, eating some more cake. I found joy in old pictures, and late night
memories of pool games. I found joy in all those little boxes I forgot I had.
I didn’t want to run away anymore, I wanted new memories, I wanted
new dreams, and I wanted new stories.
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Most of us spend our teenage years trying to fit in, and now
just a few months away from 20, I realised what a waste that was. So here is
something I, an almost 20 year old has to say to those with their teenage years
still left.
‘One day you’re 10, wanting to be a banker, doctor and
teacher all at once. Suddenly you wake up and you’re 13, and I’m sure you’re
hitting puberty soon, you feel a little different now and somewhat scared, you’re
friends are doing things your mum and dad warned you about, but you do it
anyway, you’re too cool.
Out of the blue you wake up and you’re 15, you’ve
tried it all, the alcohol was bitter and the cigarette was foul, but you did it
anyway to look smart and act tall. Somewhere down the line you forgot what the
true meaning of ‘boyfriend’ and ‘girlfriend’ was, so you walked into this promiscuous
world called speed dating.
And now you’re 18 at the brink of adulthood, lost in
the memories of your childhood. Confused, trying to define who you are from who
you want to be. You want to be young, but you’ll never be young enough, so you
go to those late night parties, have a couple of shots, remember you can’t
afford this either. So you stick to the cheap pool parties, grinding on a wet
floor covered in way too much beer, taking in the foul smell of cigarettes with
a difference. You hate it, but you just needed to fit in.
And then you wake up
and it’s your 20th birthday, hungover you try to figure out what you
want to do next, but you had too much beer last night so you’re stuck there.
Your friends will tell you who to be, what to drink, which
box of cigarettes are the best, the different ways of rolling, and the many ways
of speed dating. You can learn a lot from them, they would know what works best
with the girls, or how to dress for the boys, and they would be the best judge
for your crop top or your brand new Vans. And if they don’t like it, well you’re
disregarded. When you’re a teenager, your friends are going to be your
everything, most times you’d forget about God, or your family, you would think
you can do it. But most times, you will be alone, most times you will want to
run away and be someone you’re not.
Your friends don’t define you, you define yourself.
And you are enough.
Be 13, be 15, be 18, be young, be free.
Don’t let what they do define you.
Be who you are, love who you are, become who you want to be.
But most of all, live for yourself, you can never erase the
mistakes of your past, you can just learn from them.
Take risks, be different,
make mistakes, try new things,
BE YOUNG
Don’t let adulthood get to you. Don’t become a child again.
You only get 7 years to be a teen. Might as well be one.
BE YOU.’
--------To Be Continued--------
